I’m all for being honest, authentic and vulnerable. I’m for it not because I want sympathy, as many of you have lovingly expressed in response to many of my posts, but because I have always suspected I am not alone, even when I’ve felt so very much that way. It feels carved onto my heart to let others know they are not alone. So I throw myself out there in hopes that maybe there’s someone that may find comfort, community and encouragement here. I have prayed that God would use my pain and my words for His glory. I envisioned someone – if only one – saying, “Really? Me too!” Because there is comfort in unity and peace in understanding.
Today I don’t feel unity and I don’t feel understood. I feel alone and afraid. I feel like an outsider in the way I’m earnestly trying to love like Jesus. I feel misunderstood among those I’m supposed to be one with, and I’m grieving that.
I’m holding back a lot of thoughts and feelings because there is authentic and then there’s wisdom. Today I’m trying to be wise and allow my emotions time to process privately. So for now, just this:
9 Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.
Thank you for reading, for loving, and for your extra grace.